Waking up one morning in a very broken state of life, I heard God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit agreeing over me saying, “We can rebuild her. We have the tools.” If you grew up when I did, you’d know those are the words to the intro of the weekly sci-fi show “The Six Million Dollar Man” airing 1974-78’. Astronaut Steve Austin was in a spaceship crash and scientists rebuilt him with bionics in surgery, costing six million dollars. I had to pull up the video below. Listen to the words and insert your own name in it.
“Denise Flynn…we can rebuild her…We have the tools…We have the capability… Denise Flynn will be that woman. Better than she was before. Better…Stronger…Faster.”
Don’t you love it! No matter what's going on right now, no matter how broken you are, if you go through it right with God, you will come out healed and better. Lean into God. Use Him for His healing love and power. Know that He wants to love on you and help you. Keep your attitudes toward him and not turning away or lacking trust and hope. Don't become bitter. Be obedient. In doing so, we can count on His promises to rebuild us.
“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds" (Psalm 147:3).
“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces
perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” Romans 5:3-5
Yeah, these promises can be yours at the cost and sacrifice of Jesus. Look out for YOU…future Six Million Dollar Man and Woman in process of being rebuilt right now!
I used to be in Sales and Advertising Sales. Actually, we are all in Sales. We are selling ourselves to others all throughout life. We sell ourselves at an interview, to our children when we are promoting chores instead of Xbox, to a friend to see one movie over another, or to a significant other in a marriage proposal. (Actually, I was bought and returned on that one once, but it’s all okay now.) The list goes on.
There is a common sales and advertising slogan. “You’ll be so glad you did.” You’ll be so glad you bought my product. You’ll be so glad you’ve invested in my service. This saying has always stuck with me and I now apply it to more situations than selling or making money.
“You’ll be so glad you did.” My friends may even hear me say or write it. I wonder if they know I
am trying to persuade them when I do.
This is where the saying really fits well. You will be so glad you did not sin. You will be so glad you did not eat those extra snacks. You’ll be so glad you did not spend the extra money. You will be so glad you put in the extra time into that project. You will be so glad you did not say those extra words positioned to leap off your tongue. You’ll be so glad you gave more than you originally wanted to.
You’ll be so glad you went the extra mile. You’ll be so glad you did not withhold. You’ll be so glad you did not disappoint God. You will be so glad you did not grieve the Lord. You will be so glad you did not take advantage of His blood that He shed for you. You will be satisfied. God will be pleased and you will be with peace.
Satisfied. The word resonates sweetness. Generally, we are satisfied when we have no or few regrets. Isn’t that worth so much.
So considering “You’ll be so glad you did” the next time you really want to do something and you know you shouldn’t is a good thing. Consider it too when you really don’t want to do something and know you should. Sell yourself on it. You’ll be so glad you did.
You may have to refuse the urge several times of that thing you want to participate in. You may have to ask God several times for the grace and strength to withstand. You may have to say “Lord, make me willing.” And He will.
Life cannot always or even frequently be about the immediate pleasure, but in long term prospering. Many times we cannot easily go back to change things. It may take a long
time and much pain and prayer. I’ve been saying “NO” to a bag of chips all evening, and come tomorrow, I’ll not be wishing I had done differently. (And I’ll be so glad when my son eats
them before me.)
And this is where discipline and strength from the Lord comes in. Seek Him and it will be provided.
“I will sing of your strength, in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble.” Psalm 59:16, 17
“All your commands are trustworthy;” Psalm 119:86
So consider all deeply…You’ll be so glad you did.
Choosing Dates & Mates
Have the types of dates & mates you've chosen through the years changed? If not, you may not have grown spiritually, emotionally or relationally.
A hope is that over the years as we come closer in relationship with Christ, we would become more like him in nature…in our character, transferring over to our actions & treatment of others. A hope is that we would fall more in love with God, Jesus & the Holy Spirit. A hope is that we also would have sought wholeness, healing & deliverance for ourselves. The first does not automatically take care of the last. Sometimes people hold back from further healing due to lack or knowledge of what they’re really carrying or where to receive such help from or having pride not to disclose hurts or hangons to others. We choose better dates & mates much like when we decide to put healthier food into our own bodies, we become a better grocery shopper.
The hope is that after being transformed in those ways ourselves first, we would desire another that has the fruit of Christ & has resolved and received healing from inner wounds, great doubts & behaviors that don’t model Christ. I spoke with a person who was asked “What did your former spouse & people you dated all have in common?” The common denominator lead the person asked to a realization of what trait(s) to avoid upon becoming involved again & to take responsibility to not move forward in that case. The common denominator lead the person to committing to changing themselves to make a better future selection.
If one hasn’t courted/dated in a while, what is the reason? Is it because a male/female hasn’t been found with those qualities? We really do have to be praying for the walk & growth of our brothers & sisters, don’t we? Has one found themselves keeping better company in friendships? Has one’s inner circle become filled with love & strength rather than unnecessary drama, people acting out of the will of God or hurtful people? Those are good signs that a person has reached a deeper maturity in Christ. Is it that one has fallen so much in love with Christ that they feel content with Him alone? That’s great too! So many would love to be able to say that, but haven’t come to that place yet. Contentment is beautiful.
So our goal for ourselves should be to chase God & seek wholeness & healing first & if lead, to pursue or wait to be pursued by another with the same heart & spiritual, emotional & relational health in terms of romantic relationships. Choosing the right relationships saves us hurt & increases our joy.
When I was little, maybe around the age of 8 or 10, my mother used to make me eat grapefruit. Oh my goodness, I used to hate it. It tasted awful! It was so Sour! She made me eat it because it was healthy and good for me. It did something for my system. With true love, she would slice the grapefruit in half, run the sharp knife between all the sections of pulp and squeeze the sections and the juice into a bowl for me. Whatever health issue I had, Mom learned it good sense to force…ok, give… me grapefruit…with no or little sugar on it. Ugh! I remember sitting at the kitchen table for a long while, pleading to be released from eating the grapefruit. But I wasn’t very persuasive with Mom, or stubborn enough. I won in so many other areas though; why not this one too?
I didn't realize it then, but Mom was loving me. She gave me something that was good for my body. She loved me in the deep, caring sense of the word. And now I’m at the beautiful age of XX (smile), and I owe some of it to my loving mother along with God.
As I’ve matured into that beautiful age of XX (smile), guess what I’ve come to indeed love in my diet? Pink Grapefruit! …with a little Stevia sweetener on it. It’s so refreshing and good for my temple! I feel so proud when I eat it because I know I'm doing something really good for myself. Over the last 6 years, I’ve prepared the same for my son, who is now 19. As I began to add grapefruit into his menu, I held my breath and hoped he would like it and put up no fuss. For if he didn’t, would I really hold him to the kitchen table over it? Was I that caring caliber of a mom? But sweetly so, Cameron did love pink grapefruit early on. What a relief and a pleasing thing.
The other night, I told Cam I’d prepare a grapefruit for each of us to go with our meal and he was happy. It pleases me so to do well for him. I then said to him, “Do you know when I make you grapefruit, what it really means?” He replied, “No.” I said, “When I make you grapefruit, I’m saying 'I love you.'” I told him the background story of his Busha’s true love for me and grapefruit. I told him about the memories that are now fond ones and the appreciation of her thinking of me in that way. I shared with Cameron, that when I make you grapefruit…I’m really saying “I love you.”
He said with a very tender smile, “I didn’t know that.” My response? “Yeah, I love you Cam.”
What do you do for someone that means "I love you" from your heart that they may not be aware of? Why don't you share it with them.
Today, look what I found at the grocery checkout. Guess who gets a surprise card with a pouch of Grapefruit Melon gum inside sent to him at college this week?
The 5 Love Languages were originally broken down and taught by Gary Chapman. Great credit goes to him! He has several books with related titles geared toward teens, singles, etc..
It’s spring, a time to see growth, your growth. It’s a time to see how far
you’ve actually come, how you've developed and be encouraged to expect more. See the green.
This is one of my favorite passages from the “Marry Me!” book. Visualize it with me.
"I was driving home one warm spring day and stopped at a red light and saw a grounds crew in action outside a church. They were strategically moving fresh, black top soil and cedar mulch around the landscape’s shrubbery. My attention was drawn to the lush green bushes. Even from the street I could easily see the variation of a few inches of new, lighter green, fresh growth at the tips of each branch. How rich, vibrant and prospering they were!
Some years ago when we lived on acreage, we planted additional spruce trees for interest and to create a border from the country road. It was a day of sure sweat equity. I participated with all my muscles and weight on the transplant day, as we couldn't afford a landscape company. As time went on, each spring and throughout the summer I’d walk the grounds checking to see how much fresh growth had come and how tall and fat the trees had become, how much our hefty work had paid off and how our vision was taking place. I’d touch and stroke the soft, light green needles on the tips of the branches and know the trees were maturing into something even more desirable, providing visual pleasure and blockage from the road. Those tips of growth felt so good in my fingers and the trees grew sturdier and more beautiful every year.
How’s your new, green growth? Have you looked at it? Step back and look back and see the progress you have made in your healing or your situation and what you have come through thus far. See? Healing and growth are happening and will continue to, if you praise God, let your heart be changed and do the work that goes with it. Growth and transition gone through with the Lord as your gardener will come in soft and pleasing, not prickly, harsh or bitter. "For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus" (Philippians 1:6 NASB).
How far is it from here to there? Where am I in the “there”? I am clearly not where I was! Be encouraged. You are increasing. You are advancing. You are progressing. See your green! It's beautiful. You're beautiful!" (p. 240-241 edited)
Is there something you want to do that you know you should not? Is it fantasizing over a hot
looking girl or guy? Have you been having a little fun with letting lustful thoughts of them stay in your
mind? Are you finding it difficult to give something or someone up for the sake of honoring God and the better intentions and direction He has for your life? Is there a way to live better according to God’s word that will not be easy for you as far as the discipline required on your part?
Whatever it is you find challenging at this point, know that whatever you are not wanting to do, but do… or whatever you find hard to be without, but carry on forward without it, you can offer the challenge, the pain or the discomfort up as a sacrifice and offering to God.
Numbers 28:1-3 NIV says:
“The Lord said to Moses, 2 “Give this command to the Israelites and say to them: ‘Make sure that you present to me at the appointed time my food offerings, as an aroma pleasing to me.’ 3 Say to them: ‘This is the food offering you are to present to the Lord: two lambs a year old without defect, as a regular burnt offering each day”.
Let’s pull this apart and look inside at it.
Verse 2: “See that you present to me at the appointed time the food for my offerings made by fire,
as an aroma pleasing to me.” So you’ve got something "ungood" I’ll call it going on. it's a struggle inside of you. If you give it and consider God’s feelings above your own (that’s the sacrifice and offering part) God is going to take it as something good…”an aroma pleasing to me”.
Verse 2: “an offering made by fire”…Are you going through the fire right now? The situation is hot and trying you? If you are responding right to the fire, or right to the conviction you are in (by God’s ways), you are being purified. You are being made more into His image and going more to where He wants to take you.
Verse 3: “as a regular burnt offering each day”…Each day you give it all to the Lord as an offering…”Lord, this is (whatever you feel), but I’m offering up my plans and taking on yours instead.
May you find me and my offering pleasing to you like a fine aroma.”
God will find this pleasing. It smells good to Him. It refreshes Him you may say. And whenever you do something toward God, He rewards you.
Ladies, here’s what guys think regarding communicating your initial interest to them.
1) Males don’t like it when you initiate communication with them too often, instead of allowing them to. Whether by text, phone or email, they really want to be the leader and major initiator in this process. Too many invitations to festivities, etc. will come across the same way to them. Make yourself a communication chart if you need to and don’t tell them/him about it to track your steps. This is to have a visible way of keeping yourself accountable, not communicating more frequently than you should with them. Leave some space. You are not to be all dependent on them.
In the story of Ruth, Ruth showed Boaz her interest one time. The rest of the show was left up to Boaz; he took over from there. Ruth didn’t keep hounding Boaz and falling all over him day after day.
One male shared with me, “I want God to show me who my Ruth is, not for her to keep telling me.
And I want to be the leader.
Ruth Chapter 3:
7 When Boaz had finished eating and drinking and was in good spirits, he went over to lie down at the far end of the grain pile. Ruth approached quietly, uncovered his feet and lay down. 8 In the middle of the night something startled the man; he turned—and there was a woman lying at his feet!
9 “Who are you?” he asked.
“I am your servant Ruth,” she said. “Spread the corner of your garment over me, since you are a guardian-redeemer] of our family.”
10 “The Lord bless you, my daughter,” he replied. “This kindness is greater than that which
you showed earlier: You have not run after the younger men, whether rich or poor. 11 And now, my daughter, don’t be afraid. I will do for you all you ask. All the people of my town know that you are a woman of noble character. 12 Although it is true that I am a guardian-redeemer of our family, there is another who is more closely related than I. 13 Stay here for the night, and in the morning if he wants to do his duty as your guardian-redeemer, good; let him redeem you. But if he is not willing, as surely as the Lord lives I will do it. Lie here until morning.”
Now I must say. To me, Boaz sounded a little nonchalant about the whole thing when he said, “if he (the man who was really first in line to marry Ruth) wants to do his duty as your guardian-redeemer, good; let him redeem you.” Myself, I may have taken Boaz’s response as “He can live without me so easily.” But Ruth and Boaz had their senses, calm and trust about them; and that’s how we should be. If it’s not God, ok. If it’s God, Great!
Boaz took the lead from there and established the status of their relationship.
Further on, I love Naomi even more. Verse 16: “When Ruth came to her mother-in-law, Naomi asked, ‘How did it go, my daughter?’” We’ll always have a Naomi asking us how things went.
Smile. There is nothing new under the sun. Some things will never change. (Ecclesiastes 1:9)
2) As you are getting to know a guy in friendship, don’t joke about them being interested in you or you in them, or make underlying comments about it. That’s considered an overanxious plea--not comical or cute. In the earlier stages of a deeper relationship, don’t be too assertive in your communication either. Don’t make jokes or pokes about marriage.
3) When you see them at a gathering, don’t spend all your time and attention on them there. Spread your company around amongst different huddles.
So how much or long do you communicate with them? How much do you say to them? How much do you ask or share? Take it easy; you’re not interviewing them for a biography all in one sitting.
Picture this object in your mind right now…a fire hydrant hose. If you’ve never seen a fire hose going off, Google it. Imagine your over-communication as having similarity to a fire hose explosion. Don’t power wash the guy(s) with communication like that of the pressure of a fire hose. Don’t blow them away with all that force! Picture that. Instead, let your interest or communication come out through a regular garden hose. A regular garden hose can have a nozzle over the end for controlling the amount and strength of release of the water. Or, instead of a squirting nozzle on the end of the hose, one can just leave the opening of the hose open. Instead of shooting the guy(s) with the power flow of water, let them feel that you are drizzling refreshing water over their legs and feet as you talk with them—not at them. You are sprinkling revitalizing “just enough” words and communication out of your garden hose that will feel cool and invigorating to them. You’ll be the coolest girl leaving them to want and ask for more communication and time with you.
Now…is this male your liking receptive to your communication? Is he asking you questions about yourself too? Is he laughing? Is he looking at you during the conversation? Is he smiling? If the
answers are “yes”, then keep up your work. If the answers are “no”, then shift your eyes and desires off of the man. Always keep your eyes on the Lord primarily.
You can’t make a guy be into you for a friend or more. You can’t drag a guy to you. A man’s real heart and not his momentary emotions are generally drawn to a lady in a gentle and gradual way.
May God give you discernment in hese things. May He give you patience for all areas of your life.
May He become your first "one and only". May you have no other idols. May you know how valuable and special you are.
What makes a man feel comfortable:
~ Obviously, a man feels comfortable with a woman when he feels like he can be himself around you.
~ When he believes the woman has a genuine care and concern about him. But not the kind of care where he feels the woman may have a great romantic interest in him that he cannot return ...this would make him feel uncomfortable instead.
~ When a woman gives him ample time to talk, while you listen to his heart. So become a better patient listener than a talker.
~ Being respected.
~ Being honored.
~ You acknowledging that you like his ideas and what he brings to the table in your relationship, circle of influence and the body of Christ.
~ Before your company commences, setting an atmosphere through prayer and going into the presence of God yourself.
~ During your company, allowing an atmosphere of humor and laughter.
~ Use his name. Most people whether they realize it or not, love to be called by their name in conversations. Think about it from a spiritual aspect as well...God called you by name.
“I have called you by name” (Isaiah 43:1 NLT).
~ Be a balanced and stable woman of emotions. Frequent changing highs and lows rollercoaster rides should only be at the amusement park. This means you are dependent on God and His word to transform you into this beauty.
~ Let him know and prove that you are trustworthy. You are going to keep the personal information and the feelings they share safe, not sharing it with others. A safe place makes it easier for him to open up to you.
~ Have a tender heart.
Wisdom & encouragement for you & to share with others!
Denise Flynn writes about Singleness, Relationships, Goal Obtainment & the Christian walk. Order